Expression of emotion has been suppressed or frowned upon in various historical societies — in a majority of them, actually — and today’s society is no exception.

Have you ever experienced twinges of guilt for being sad or upset? Or perhaps even when you’re having a great day or you’re really excited about something? That twinge of guilt when our emotions are markedly below or above average is because our society feeds us the message that we should “just get over it” in order to equalize our feelings with the feelings of those around us.

Though it seems that effort to promote healthy expression of emotion is made by influential forces of our present world (movies, music, literary works, etc.), and while such things that are part of our culture seem to even lend temporary confidence to express real emotion to those who lack it, expression of emotion in our society is heavily affected by suppressive cultural norms. And often, the cultural norms of our modern society, much like those in societies past, prohibit healthy expression of emotion through what is considered appropriate or proper behavior.

It is not humanly natural, as we are individuals meant to have unique feelings, but is a side-effect attached to heightened emotion by our cultural norm: simply toss our personal emotions aside so that they will not affect others.

Emotional expression (in psychology) is defined as “observable verbal and nonverbal behaviors that communicate an internal emotional or affective state” and is considered crucial to the mental and sentimental health of humans, and even animals. According to an article from mysahana.org, a website of posts dedicated to maximizing mental and emotional health, and other research, suppression of emotions and feelings can often lead to violent behavior and depression due to its principal part in the social aspects of one’s life.

Our emotions are meant to help us connect to others on deep, soulful levels. If you’re angry, sad, upset or any other negative emotion of the like, don’t be afraid to express yourself to someone you trust or who cares about you; if they really do care, expressing your emotions can help you form a deeper bond with them. They will not judge you based on our social norms if they truly want to understand.

If you’re happy, smile, laugh, be happy, share your joy with others, spread it. Again, those who truly care will not judge you, but be glad that you’ve helped them feel joy, too. Though expression of emotion must be handled with care so as not to actually have negative effects on others, if you take the time to get to know yourself and your behaviors and observe that of those around you, accepting and expressing emotions should come completely naturally.

As humans, each and every one of us has feelings, and we are meant to share our joys and sorrows with each other; that’s how we create strong, positive relationships with one another. If we let society tell us that suppressing feelings for the sake of others is the right thing to do, we can never progress toward positive expressional terms with the people around us and will not get the opportunity to understand others or to be understood by others.