Disclaimer: This story is purely satirical, in honor of April Fool’s Day on April 1. It is not meant to be taken at face value.

Sony’s newest film production provides for a new unadulterated form of media for children that leaves parents outraged.

Starting at the beginning, on March 14, Sony Pictures posted to YouTube the first trailer for their animated film: “Sausage Party.”

Hearing the title, it’s safe to assume that Sony’s newest film idea is a party setting containing a multitude of men’s genitalia and hot dogs. Which is being cooked, who knows?

Settling back and starting to view the restricted rating trailer, the childlike animation of love between a hotdog and a vaginal-looking bun lets kids run their minds into fanatical areas of the things food can do.

Although having a high parental approval rating for the first 30 seconds of food romance, afterwards that approval drastically drops when the food goes home with an attractive mom. Horny, right?

Getting to the root of the trailer, it is discovered that this seemingly innocent version of pornography, snared viewers into a gored and profanity-filled trailer, leaving parents offended and children scarred.

And who can blame them? Watching a lady eat screaming baby carrots and hearing f@%k screamed more times than in “The Hangover” series can cause any porn adoring child and their parents to be scarred for the rest of their relative lives. I mean, who cares if a preadolescent child, easily susceptible to addiction, watches as much animated food porn as they want, so long as there’s not any profanity or murderous scenes, right?

Class-A parenting America.